Episode 8: True Lies

[teetheyes]

Having trouble making ends meet?

Has your marital bliss fallen into disarray?

Is your significant other an amnesiac?

Cheating? Pregnant? Out?

Dear Anon is open for business... and he's going to break the ice himself.

I'm so sorry baby but it isn't mine. I'm sterile.

Today's Playlist:
"Girlfriend in a Coma" The Smiths
"Your Woman" Whitetown
"Ms. Jackson" Outkast
"Papa Don't Preach" Madonna
"No More Drama" Mary J. Blige
"Blue Pepper" Duke Ellington

Dedication:
"Shadows On The Sand" Glenn Miller, to Mister Smith from E. Defense

[ooc: Mod-approved! Songs are played between bits of dialogue. As far as the radio host is concerned, Cori's speaking anonymously and that applies to the written transcriptions on his LJ. It's just easier and more efficient to put them here instead of creating a 'ghost' account. So please consider Radio Entries as anonymous and any spam here will be answered by anonymous. Thanks guys ♥]

Comments

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Dear Anon,

...I heet mon pimp! He iz so stupide! And his Choochoo is so zmall! And my brothe~er iz an idiot!

Oh, but to be a poor ge-rl in theze days!

Anon, cherie... do zhou need a meid?

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

... Metaphorically or literally?

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Everyzhing Monsieur wants, non? Tres courte! And ze skert, bien, very short... and ze , ah...

Ze maid, she is verreh silent, very o~be~di~ent, everyzhing you need, Monsieur, non?

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

... Would you like whoreos with that?

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Maybe, but tongue-tricks pe~ey extra.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

... Are you willing to tongue trick someone's papa?

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...he pays, I deliver.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

Someone might pay for him.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Sweetheart, I'm running a business here - you got the money? I ain't got the whims. Tomorrow? Fresh start. Your boy wants a piece of this hot pie? We're talking blues here.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

.... Blues.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Blue coins, sugar - what, think good stuff like this comes cheap?

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

Tell me about your siblings.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Oh. Them.

So, my brother? He's such a fucking pussy. He has this broad of his, sleeps around, ain't even getting money for it - so she fucks everything that moves or squeaks, then comes back big-belly, and I said to Corey-Jean, I said, "Baby, do you want sis to handle this? Baby, I can get that out of her, it ain't yours, baby boy, and she's a whore and a harlot, and I'll eat her eyes for you, boy," but he just shrugged, cause that's what my Corey-Jean does, he's a delicate soul, you know? And he's putting up with this shit that no man who ain't Jesus has put up with, and my boy, my Corey-Jean, my heart breaks for'im, but what can you do, where there ain't a good mind to him?

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

... Is he going to propose? Deity welfare is a comfortable gig.

midnight!

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...skeletons... cannot... propose.... I assure you.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

... So about that offer made...

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

What offer?

You will want to mind your words now.

[one-that-leads.livejournal.com]

Yo bes' watch yo' mouf, bitch.

And, fo' tha record, Ah am whatchoo call pro~por~tion~ate, thank yew.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Meep! Monsieur!

Monsieur is indeed verreh pro~por~tion~ate.... mais... ... for a Ken-doll...

[one-that-leads.livejournal.com]

Yeeh, yeeh, gettin' warmeh princess. I fink I can, as they say, stay mah hand fo' tha moment mmm...

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...you know what, you French faggot? I quit.

I'm taking my business with Goodfellow from now on. Jesus All-Mighty, who talks like that?!

[one-that-leads.livejournal.com]

What? What?

What the hell?! You can't fucking quit? Man, hell no, that's bullshit! Naw, you don't just quit on me, Princess. Aw, hell no!

Yeah, dat pimp slap you been avoidin'? It's coming atcha.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

I'll speak with Goodfellow - I've spoken with my clients - I ain't honouring shit tonight so ha ha ha goodbye to that cash, you pussy! And you know what? Clients? Coming with me.

[one-that-leads.livejournal.com]

FUCK!

YOU GET YO' BITCH ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW, ROSIELLE!

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

I think I'll be Madame Rosielle hereon, in fact. I'll grab some of Goodfellow's girls and - oh yes indeed, we can work this out. Competition, Katan. And unlike you two gents, I know what to expect.