(no subject)

[teetheyes]

I've got a few words for the crew...

YOU ALL WOULD STARVE WITHOUT ME

So shut your traps about the food and STOP spanking the hired help. How's a galley wench supposed to watch my broth when you all are trying to balance your mead on her bosom? Back the fuck off.

Thessaly, I have something for you.

.... Well it looks like a fucking comb to me!

Comments

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...orange marmelade, then...?

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

.... Will you join the galley crew as a wench waitress?

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Such an enchanting proposal. Honoured, to be certain - and yet, underqualified, you see. The natural possession of actual intellect can't be helped. Not a matter of your concern, to be sure.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

It's okay you can just say you're ugly.

[silkcutremix.livejournal.com]

Don't mind her, mate, even if they need another arse to pinch around.

((OOC: Oh, he did that on purpose. >3))

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...a failure at cooking and puns, I see.

One wonders why they keep you around, then, and --

...oh, no, wait. I do know why you're being kept around. Yare-yare, Cori-dahling. Proper chef like you, never gives himself a chance to sit down, does he...? ^__^

1/2

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

...

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

I CAN COOK.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

And so well, that the crew is thriving on a size 0.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

The hired help looks supple to me.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Possibly because they've been FASTING to redeem themselves of whatever sins they committed to be rewarded with YOUR cooking.

Hmmm.

Or mayhap it's not the food - perhaps they're all reticent to eat for fear of where those hands've been.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

I CAN COOK YOU SORRY EXCUSE FOR AN.... WHAT ARE YOU AGAIN!? I FORGOT IN THE MIDST OF BOILING MY ANGEL PASTA.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

I hope you're not insinuating you're eating me.

[silkcutremix.livejournal.com]

Well, angel hair pasta is ace.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...care to earn your pirate's eye patch, Captain...?

[silkcutremix.livejournal.com]

Come again?

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Never did the first time around, either. Inconsiderate, that ~

[silkcutremix.livejournal.com]

Yeah, so what about me eyes then?

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Pretty.

[silkcutremix.livejournal.com]

I get that a lot.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

We're still talking about him and not you, right.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

Lunch is lunch.

A Cook should know about taking one's three meals most seriously.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

I don't serve spoiled meat to the captain.