Episode 13: that was no piccolo, that was my fife

[teetheyes]

There must be something about the orchestral quality of concert music that draws out the wartime comparisons. But let me give you the hard and dirty truth.

How do you know that you have a brass section at your door?
Nobody knows when to come in.

What do you call perfect pitch in an oboe?
In the dumpster, without hitting the side.

What's the similarity between a percussionist and a philosopher?
They both perceive time as an abstract concept.

You see a conductor and a violinist crossing the road. You can hit only one. Which do you hit?
The conductor; business before pleasure.

What do a singer and a terrorist have in common?
They both destroy the bridge.

Visual Guide to the playlist for anyone born before 1939











Today's Playlist:
"I Shot the Sheriff" Bob Marley
"Where It's At" Beck
"Bullet with Butterfly Wings" Smashing Pumpkins
"Peaches" The Presidents of the United States of America
"Party Up (Up in Here)" DMX

[ooc: Mod-approved! Songs are played between bits of dialogue. As far as the radio host is concerned, Cori's speaking anonymously and that applies to the written transcriptions on his LJ. It's just easier and more efficient to put them here instead of creating a 'ghost' account. So please consider Radio Entries as anonymous and any spam (text or voice, up to you) here will be answered by anonymous. Thanks guys ♥]

Comments

[musicalcorpse.livejournal.com]

Sir, I'm not sure where to begin.

[playstheblues.livejournal.com]

What about the trumpet?

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

Did you know Bach had fourteen or so children? They say there were no stops on his organ.

1/3

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

A jazz trumpeter was hired to do some solos with a symphony orchestra. Everything went fine through the first movement where he had some really hair-raising solos, but in the second movement he started improvising madly when he wasn't supposed to play at all.

After the concert, the conductor came round looking for an explanation. The trumpeter said, "I looked in the score and it said 'tacet'--so I took it!"

[y-soy-rebelde.livejournal.com]

So you don't play anything recorded after 1999 or what? Or maybe you've just got a thing for 90's rock.

[playstheblues.livejournal.com]

[musicalcorpse.livejournal.com]

...Humorous. However I can't help but think that there is something to be said for brevity.

[playstheblues.livejournal.com]

[playstheblues.livejournal.com]

[playstheblues.livejournal.com]

...ha. Ha.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

Do you have a request?

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

So say it.

1/3

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

It's a joke.

[playstheblues.livejournal.com]

Then play some Sinatra, will you?

[musicalcorpse.livejournal.com]

The fifth would have been especially brilliant on its own. After so many consecutively it becomes tedious.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

I smell a professional.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

"Strangers in the Night" just for you.

[playstheblues.livejournal.com]

Thanks. And don't make fun of the brass section.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

You can spot a future trombone player at the playground because it's the kid who can't swing and doesn't know how to use the slide.

[musicalcorpse.livejournal.com]

I haven't been decomposing long enough for that.

[bitingnightmare.livejournal.com]

How long have you then?